Exactly, characters with high influence in the realm, often the ruler but not always, are choosing what their character would do over what's fun for everybody which just kills. Role play is great but when your making choices that affect long term fun, role play should be a lower priority than fun regardless of your position.
Of course if something is fun for
everybody, then you should do it. However, I think you underestimate one big aspect: consistent character roleplay is a big part of the fun in BM.
When I see a character take an action that is contrary to everything they've shown before for obviously OOC consideration, then
I'm not having fun, whether this leads to a war or not.
