My take on the respect vis-a-vis hieracrhy is simple: Rank matters less than your actual influence. Don't insult people you can't handle, no matter their station.
That's an interesting take. I've seen a few people in the last week or so treat my Dwilight character with respect far above his feudal ranking of lord even though they were dukes. (Placed him at least on an equal level, if not above them to the point of flattery)
