Author Topic: When your home doesn't feel as your home anymore  (Read 678 times)

D'Espana

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So, just wanting to collect some (hopefully constructive) feedback over my roleplays. Last days I've been asking myself what to improve, and who would be better judge than you guys?  :P Anyways, I want to see what do you think about this one, which reflects the thoughts of my character, but perhaps can also offend some people, something I did not think about before sending it. There it goes!

Guldor finally entered Anacan's gates, putting an end to a several days journey towards the battlefront. At the same time his foot stepped inside the city, a whole wave of memories assaulted his mind. The times of the old Cathay, when it stood proud and defiant to the many threats at its frontiers, as if it would last forever. Guldor sighed, negating with his head. It had taken less than he had thought to destroy Cathay, betrayed by both foreigners and, above all, even Cathayans; only to see it restored later by a bunch of traitors who, obviously, had little to no idea about the meaning of the word honour and, above all, the spirit of the true Cathay.

 He walked through the city, filled with a stormy mood. The places he so very well remembered seemed extremely familiar, but something seemed to have changed in them. Guldor made a saddened smile: "Probably it is me the one changed", he thought.

 After having visited the places he knew the most, he just wandered around with no specific objective, and after some hours, at the start of sunset, he decided to return to his basement, where his soldiers and servants awaited for him.

 - Welcome, m'Lord! - said Lionel, his personal servant - We were waiting for your arrival.

 - Not now, Lionel. I am not in the mood to talk.

 - I... see, m'Lord. Then, I shall not disturb you. May I bring something to m'Lord before retreating?

 - Yes, bring me a fine wine. And after that, tell Geoffrey to send a letter to Strategic Commander Wilhelm Altenahr. I want to know where will be going to act next.

 - Understood, m'Lord. Something else?

 - No, Lionel. You may leave.

 Once alone, Guldor awaited for the wine, and once he had a goblet served, he stood still. Some minutes later, he finally lost his temper, and throwing the glass to the floor, he started shouting:

 - This city will never belong to you, so-called Cathayans! Your betray lies as a burden on your honour, and this land you have made from lies and deceit will never replace the fallen realm of my heart! Just await, feeling safe and comforted in your viper's nest, because sooner or later justice will be brought upon all of you!

 He breathed deeply, his not so young chest trying to recover the normal breathing rythm. Lionel appeared suddenly, inquiring for the reason of the commotion.

 - It is not your business, Lionel. Clean this all up, and do it quick.

 Guldor exited the tent, looking for fresh air. His eyes looked first to Anacan, then to the point where he knew that Kindara started, many miles to the West.

 - I hate what you have become, Cathayans. - he whispered - But if I am able to return even a minimum damage to Kindara, the final destroyers of my Cathay, then I will fight with you. Just for this time. Just for this purpose.

 His rage now tempered, he entered his tent once again, and awaited there for the orders from his Strategic Commander.
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D'Espana

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This one comes from my (to this point) worst mistake in BM. Attacking Azros alone against some of the Kindaran army. Enjoy!

Guldor approached the city, his original intention being just to look once more to the place where the dream of the old Cathay had fallen. The strong nostalgy made him to close distances more than he should, and soon the alarm horns echoed through the city. Stunned at first, Guldor suddenly realized that he was travelling with a hundred soldiers, obviously enough to ring the alarms of the city, and his astonishment grew even bigger when all his soldiers started to charge blindly towards the walls. He puffed and started running behind them, yelling to the top of his voice as the arrows came off the city:

- When I ordered you to charge for any enemy in sight, I obviously was not considering a full-defended stronghooooooooooooooooooooooold!

There was no case. In less than it takes for a noble to get dress in his battle gear, most of the Dragon Shields were scattered on the ground, killed by the inmensely superior Kindaran army. Guldor himself was wounded, albeit the arrow had not made his way through all the protections he was wearing. Thus, he quickly gathered the few wounded survivors and ordered a full retreat, his mind still lost in the same question:

- What the hell has just happened? - he wondered, thinking about the uncomprehensible disaster and the letter he would have to send to his Strategic Commander.

(OOC: Yep, that's a proof that you shouldn't make movements after coming from a party in a post-party status. Wrong settings and travel to the wrong region. Sweet!)
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