Roleplay from Sigrid Gudrun Auru'in
Message sent to everyone in the region Sordidus (72 recipients)
"Lady! Stop! Wait! Hey! Sig- OOF!"
One moment there's an idiot stranger running straight for a lady of the court; then there's a human pretzel with a face full of mud and two daggers across his throat. Another day in the life of a supposed princess who'd much rather be stabbing people than serving as a glorified scout.
"Speak - carefully."
The black Phoenix "Fate" barely glimmers as the crimson-winged "Faith" rightly glows - parallel blades wrought in an age few men might recall - now resting gently at the throat of one more man who might not live to know their names.
"I- g'ah! !@#$ - Sorry, I- urgh-"
Figures.
"Wretch - spit it out."
As if waiting for his cue, the fool retches and spits out a disgusting mixture of bile, partially-digested rations, and mud. It spills forth like a weak geyser, radiating outward and arcing away from Sigrid's already miserable leathers. Unfortunately, it still manages to splash onto her boots.
"Name."
Coughing up a storm, the idiot struggles to intonate his own given name over a pattern of intermittent burps, retches, and something inhumanly non-verbal along the lines of,
"Uuuurgh... F-fitz-Blaaaeeeuuurghhh-"
Patient as a feline, she waits for the man to cough up whatever other organs he can spare. When his final gastric false-starts prove futile, her patience is rewarded. Unfortunately the proverbial dam implodes in her face when he realizes she'd put away her blades a solid 2 minutes into the ordeal. Oops. She broke him.
"Urgh... Thank ye', M'Lady. Almost died chokin' on me own innards, that I did. Name's Fitzgerald, son of Robin, coincident'ly husband o'Robin, hur hur. Me wife'll love tae meet ya, Princess Sigrid, yer a good lass, sorry fer runnin' into ye' all o'sudden, is just I've a message from Talon Kinsey an' I can't run too well on account o'my bum knee, but where was I - he needs ye' back at Sordidus immedit'ly, firget th' temple, the whole bloody southern army just shown up on our doorstep an-"
"I liked you better when you were choking... What am I supposed to tell your wife now? Sorry Ma'am, I think I broke your husband..."
Suddenly Fitzgerald laughs - and so does she. After a minute or two of absolutely hysterical cackling, they wipe tears from their eyes and clasp arms as a sign of peace and brotherhood.
"If you promise not to vomit, you can ride back-saddle with me."
The two grin and head off on their way back to Sordidus - as nonchalant as one can be - straight into the open maw of war.
Logged
Apsu@Legends. BM: Yxevarii Auru'in, Grandmistress [Ruler;Priestess-Inquisitor] (Obia'Syela-BT); Sigrid Gudrun Auru'in, Avenging Exile of Xavax, Countess of Slimbar (Redhaven-EC); Masalu Auru'in, Linguistically-Challenged Sumerian Death-Cultist (D'hara-DW)