Author Topic: Aquila Schwarzherzig - Bungalows and Bodycounts  (Read 115 times)


  • Marketing
  • Mighty Duke
  • *****
  • Posts: 1280
  • Formerly the Himoura Family. Currently ?????????
    • View Profile
Aquila Schwarzherzig - Bungalows and Bodycounts
« Topic Start: September 06, 2018, 08:08:42 AM »
Aquila grinned ferociously as she took her place in formation with her men. She gripped her barbed sword in one hand, and a meat hook in the other.

"The Solstice came early this year! More skulls!" She roared, and grinned with a feral glee, seeing the enemy line up, up close. "The fools want to die quickly! Oblige them!" She shouted, and her captain blew on his horn, signalling the advance to begin, whilst the Tilogian troops cowered and hid. Arrows flew, and the cavalry charged, and the Abyssal Rejects pressed on in a tight column, chanting as they went, and then they were upon the enemy. The Abyssal Rejects crashed into the Blackpikes, and the column quickly broke the box formation before them. Men spilled out of the column, screams of rage in their throats. Pikes were battered down, and the Rejects fell upon their foe, butchering the men of the Blackpike. Aquila was with them, and with a bloodthirsty roar, she laid into her foe, her barbed blade ripping the man's throat out. She pivoted, and was face to face with their commander, Dame Elena.

"I'm going to make your hide into a new pair of boots!" Aquila roared, swinging her blade in a wild arc, which Elena blocked, throwing her off balance, and Aquila stepped in, sinking her meat hook into her armpit, the point finding a seam in Elena's armor, and piercing and ripping flesh. Elena screamed, and at that moment the Blackpikes broke, fleeing, and Elena took the opening to rip free, and flee with her men. As the Blackpikes fled past, one of them drove his pike into Aquila's back, her armor keeping the pike from sinking too deep. Aquila cried out, a mix of pain and ecstasy, and she dropped her meat hook to the ground, her left arm hanging useless at her side.

"Get back here!" Aquila screamed, hacking at the fleeing men with her sword.

"Onto them!" Aquila bellowed, and she and the Abyssal Rejects surged forward and into the Fitz Roberts Almogavas. The mixed infantry was already having trouble with a mob of angry peasants, their commander already wounded. The Abyssal Rejects cut a swath through them, the Gothicans falling like wheat under the scythe. Aquila spotted Hedwiga, Gothica's Necromancer, limping away from the fight.

"No you don't!" She roared, breaking ranks, and throwing herself into the fleeing commander. The two women tumbled to the ground, and Aquila wound up on top, ripping off her foe's helmet. She raised the helmet and brought it down on Hedwiga's face, causing a sickening crunch as Hedwiga's nose exploded into a mist of blood. Aquila brought it down again, and again, screaming "BOIL MY HEAD! NO, BOIL YOURS YOU INCOMPETENT TART!" Aquila brought the helmet down again, and stood up, glancing around. She flexed her left hand, and laughed. She already felt better, the wound on her shoulder rapidly healing itself, thanks to the blessings of the Pyre of Plenty. She continued to giggle, and looked at the dazed and bloodied form of Hedwiga Fitz Roberts, and spit on the stunned noble.

"Bring me a chain!" Aquila barked, and fastened the chain around Hedwiga's neck. "Take her weapons."

Her men quickly stripped the Gothican noble of her weapons and armor. Aquila snarled, and pulled on the chain. Hedwiga, recovering from her daze, tried to stand. Aquila kicked the Gothican hard, in the ribs, taking the wind out of her.

"Crawl, like the worm you are." Aquila barked, kicking the Necromancer again. Aquila began to drag the Gothican along, until she finally found her bearing on all fours, dragging her past the jeering crowds of Arenese and Halcyonian troops.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2018, 12:04:15 PM by Stabbity »
Life is a dance, it is only fitting that death sing the tune.


  • Marketing
  • Mighty Duke
  • *****
  • Posts: 1280
  • Formerly the Himoura Family. Currently ?????????
    • View Profile
Re: Aquila Schwarzherzig - Bungalows and Bodycounts
« Reply #1: October 16, 2018, 04:17:08 AM »
 Roleplay from Dazen Guile
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 19 hours, 51 minutes ago

With his six surviving unwounded soldiers, Dazen gathers up his box of jams and preservatives and carefully picks his way across the battlefield mere hours after the battle finished. Crows have already started cawing and circling overhead, adding a surreal music to the odd sight of a fully grown man in the standard blacks and reds of House Guile...skipping along and whistling through the corpses men and women from both sides of the war.

Looking around, Dazen realises that he doesn’t actually know which direction the Lady Warlord’s tent is. He knows the banner of his kinswoman and her esteemed House, but nothing of the layout of an Arenite camp. Getting inspired, he stops by one of the wounded who isn’t quite dead, but has been left on the field as a lost cause...

“You there, ugly. Which way to Lady Aquila’s encampment?” Dazen asks in a friendly tone, dropping into a crouch next to the man and cocking his head from side to side like a fox that hears a mouse under the soil.

“ Portions!” The soldier from Aren gasps out, rather predictably.

Dazen simply shrugs, withdraws the stiletto dagger from his left sleeve, cuts the mans throat, wipes off his blade and returns it home, hops up and keeps skipping through the field of dead with his small retinue of men shocked at the sight of their commander full-fledged murdering after a battle. Dazen had apparently inherited more of the Guile Sickness than previously thought.

“LADY WARLOOOOORD! Where in the blazes is she?” He shouts from atop a small pile of Tilogian men who must have put up a ferocious fight. “If she wants to meet, she will need to find me” plopping down unceremoniously on top of the corpses, Dazen shifts one under his knees so he can recline and still have a good vantage of the area.

 Roleplay from Aquila Schwarzherzig
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 19 hours, 44 minutes ago

A small group of burly, heavily scarred men cocked their heads and approached the curious man calling out for the Warlord. Having shed their thick platemail, one could see the eagle branded upon their chests. They carried short, hooked blades, and burlap sacks, stained and dripping.

"OY, MAGGOT LORD!" Their leader bellowed at the man. "THE WARLORD WILL SEE YOU!" And he gestured, his hooked blade dripping with gore.

 Roleplay from Dazen Guile
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 19 hours, 38 minutes ago

Looking at the cattle-branded troops of his cousin, Dazen knows he has found the right people immediately. Very few are capable of the shenanigans that his direct or extended family get up to. Sniffing towards the muscled dunderheads, the young Knight of Windaria is appalled by their uncouth demeanour.

“You, sir, are terribly loud. I have ears that work, obviously. Now, take me to your leader! There is jam at stake, man!” Dazen retorts to the shouting man.

 Roleplay from Aquila Schwarzherzig
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 19 hours, 18 minutes ago

"THE QUIET OFFENDS THE WARLORD!" the man bellowed, gesturing for Dazen to follow. The man and his posse lead Dazen on a winding path past camps, and through a maze of sharpened stakes, and into a camp. The noise was overwhelming, a mixture of racous laughter and screams. Prisoners were being strapped down to posts and flayed. To add further indignity, the soldiers were rubbing a yellow powder onto the flayed bodies, eliciting screams even from the Tilogian soldiers.

Dazen was lead past several large pots of boiling vinegar, his stomach turning to imagine what was within. Another turn and a large, luxurious tent was in sight, and next to it, a throne of pristine skulls... The Warlord's trophies. A female voice reached Dazen's ears... Singing.

"Five little Tilogians,
Jumping on the bed.
One fell off,
And bumped his head
Mama called the healer,
And the doctor said:
No more Tilogians
jumping on the bed!"

And as Dazen approached, he could see a petite woman, skipping rope... No, not rope. Dazen was greeted with the sight of one screaming Tilogian soldier and one screaming Portionese soldier, tied down, and their intestines unfurled and being used in what appeared to be a morbid game of double dutch.

Aquila noticed the newcomers, and made her way toward her throne. She sat upon and looked at Dazen.

"Dazen Guile I presume?" her even, civilized tone seemed to clash horribly with the surroundings. She was clad in fine silks, the reds and blacks of her house, a similarity shared with House Guile.

 Roleplay from Dazen Guile
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 19 hours, 1 minute ago

With nothing but an oblivious smile on his face, Dazen takes in the sight of the Warlord’s camp and easily overlooks the pain and suffering that is happening to those around him.

A tip of his head and a soft bow at the mention of his name, and his head resumes cocking back and forth while absorbing all that is his Cousin’s throne and style.

“Indeed m’lady, it is I: Dazen Guile! Jam master and berry aficionado extraordinaire! A pleasure to meet you, although I do wish it had been under more peaceful circumstances. That is quite a seat you have, I imagine the logistics of transport are a bit of a nightmare...” he says in his normal cheerful tone.

 Roleplay from Aquila Schwarzherzig
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 18 hours, 51 minutes ago

"I imagine the logistics of transport are a bit of a nightmare..."

Aquila clapped twice, and half a dozen men with brands upon their foreheads came rushing up, seizing iron bars attached to a wooden platform, and lifted the throne, with Aquila still seated upon it.

"There is nothing that cannot be done through the application of brute force and sheer willpower cousin." Aquila remarked with a smirk. She clapped again, and the slaves set her down. She clapped again and a young woman came running, and knelt next to the throne, meekly mumbling,


Aquila gestured towards a cushioned bench.

"Have a seat and enjoy my hospitality. I have had my own special jam prepared for you. Fresh as can be." Aquila snapped at the slave, and soon a table was set up before Dazen, with a plate, a slice of fresh baked bread, a jar of gooey red paste, and a small silver butter knife.

"Please, tell me what you think."

 Roleplay from Dazen Guile
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 10 hours, 47 minutes ago

“Impressive thrall-work. I might need to get me a few of those kinds of servants. Mine are too free-willed.” Dazen says with a glance to his few remaining men.

Watching the table be set and the red jam placed before him, Dazen very unceremoniously digs in and devours the bread, the salted and rather thick jam, and is chewing on the silvery knife before he remembers his place.

“T’was different, and of a berry I am not familiar with. You must send me the recipe, I feel that is a delicacy that could be taken around the entire Colonies to great success.” He says, wiping his mouth quite delicately as he rises. With a silent gesture to his men, they come rushing up and carrying the treasure trove that is the Guile Jam Box. Selecting two dark purple jars with little white red ribbons around their necks, Dazen places them in the table for his cousin.

“These are from Coness, in far away Beluaterra. I am quite sure nothing like them exists elsewhere, as the recipe was that of the First Grand Wizard of the North. You must forgive me cousin, I hear the horns blowing and I must be returning to my foolishly wounded men. We shall meet again, trust in that. And of course, thank you for the treat! All jams, be they berry or not, are worthy of consideration.” And bowing with a flourish, Dazen and his men make a bee-line toward their camp, skipping the entire way to throw off any archers who might be taking aim.

 Letter from Aquila Schwarzherzig
Message sent to everyone in Bode Batura (30 recipients) - 2 days, 6 hours, 27 minutes ago

Dear cousin,

You left before I could tell you how to make my famous Portionese Eyeball jam!

Lady Aquila Schwarzherzig
Warlord of Aren
Dame of Alowca
Marshal of the Alowcan Prowlers
Life is a dance, it is only fitting that death sing the tune.