It really falls to the players themselves. Nobody is going to stick around in a realm where nobody talks or even acknowledges your existence, except those rusted in place. The majority of realms I've joined recently full-on ignored me. No welcome message, nobody telling me what to do or where to go, no Lords seeking my servitude. Even when I did get an estate, the Lords just kept ignoring my existance. THAT is what drives new people away.
