Well the issue seems to be, partially, that new players are not involved enough or that the prospects for becoming "someone" are too small in large realms. When you have multiple small realms, there are simply way more positions to hand out... for starters. Next to that, it just sounds like fun to me. I mean, no huge battles and such, but rather smaller clashes. I think it would intensify the "feel of play" for many people, because they can relate more to a smaller realm.
Big monolithic realms tend to have lower social mobility and such new characters have a hard time going up the ladder of power, but I believe divided and conflicted realms tend to scare most new players and don't integrate them as well. Theoretically, I would think it should be the opposite, but I guess that's just because of my style of play. Instead of being excited about all the strife going on, they seem to just be too confused and intimidated, with a general feeling that the realm is basically too incompetent to work together for a common goal. Most of the new players from which I had feedback that started with some characters in divided realms seem to react like this. They don't feel like they are part of a smaller team, they simple feel there isn't any team at all.
Personally, though, I tend to prefer smaller realms. I've grown a liking to Enweil, in part because of the power it allows me to wield, but overall I feel small realms are best. But nationalism is something you just can't defeat by saying it's bad, because every ruler and council member has every reason in the world to promote it. It is usually the easiest way to get anything done. And really, it's just a pejorative word for team spirit. If you want to end nationalism, it means you want to end team play being on the realm level. At which point you are basically turning the duchies into realms. How far down should we kill nationalism?
I think you've been accostomed to the bm-standard of what a small realm is. When I'm saying small realm, I mean 1-5 regions or so.
If it has 7 like Medina and D´Hara or 10 like Libero Empire, it is not small, more like medium.
13+ is large. 20+ is huge empires. 25+ is insane.
You are correct that Asylon, Barca and Aurvandil are small realms (in my opinion) but I am mostly speaking about EC, FEI and Atamara now since Dwilight and Beluaterra has special conditions (all the monsters/undead and still colonizing).
I agree, I don't consider D'Hara to be a "small realm", especially considering that 3 of its 7 regions are decently-sized cities. That being said, I like medium realms as well, they tend to hold most of the small realms' characteristics, but on a larger scale.
Can indeed, but since the Dukes have been put their by showing their loyalty to the ruler, I think most just stick with that character trait.
When the western duchies of Enweil got neglected by the central government time after time after the invasion, it got organized. Despite being tiny border cities with big control problems, constant spawns, and a whooping 3 regions in their 2 duchies, they pulled all of their nobles out of the main army and created the Western Defenders army, which also got knights from the duchy of Fengen belonging to its western regions. Now, the army is moving in an organized matter, the constant rogue spawns are dealt with almost always immediately, Iato has fully recovered from its long rogue occupations and regions are being added to the west to allow its duchies to grow. Since the Army of Fengen was still big enough to deal with all the rogues of the east and north, the Western Defenders just don't bother with these anymore, sticking purely to their area.
Most stick with blind following, but to a certain extent. I've seen others organize whenever they see their duchies in trouble, as being duke grants considerable power and wealth (not to mention being a permanent position as long as the city doesn't revolt) and nobody wants to lose this. Not so much motivation for most lords, but there is considerable incentives for dukes to say "shove it" to the rest of the realm if they feel neglected.
As such, from my experiences, dukes of stable cities tend to be very loyal to the ruler as such obedience guarantees that their reign is not threatened. However, if their risk of losing their duchy is greater from staying loyal than from standing up, then we see a lot more dukes actually standing up for themselves. Isolated, neglected, starving and/or revolting cities were the source of a great number of the game's secessions, I believe. Dukes often prefer a secession than having their cities turn rogue (and then risking not getting it back).