Numbers 2 and 3 resemble my char in Highmarch. Crazy competition if you join there? lol
If you want to go the unstable route, I think one of the more progressive realms is a good place. Lots of free thinkers who can get rubbed the wrong way. Tons of potential enemies.
The unfortunate business is that Xavax was one of the greatest realms I have ever played in. It was an extreme rarity, especially in this age of the game. While I will say don't expect the same experience as you had in GX, I will also say it is what you make it. The more you interact and role play in a realm, the higher the odds are of other players interacting, forming character relations, and spicing up the game.
So I guess the real question isn't what can a potential realm do for you, but rather what can you do for a potential realm?
FOR THE IMPERIUM!!