funniest moments in battlemaster

[Duvaille]

When part of the army of Luria Nova arrived in Poryatown (capital of federated Solaria) and one of Solaria's nobles went into a panic about the murderous Novans coming to take their capital while it was he who had set his unit to evasive and freaked out over the "No Battle in Poryatown" report. 

Having a somewhat personal stake at the matter, I must admit the incident itself and the necessary follow-up has been quite entertaining. I confess I had no idea that the game would generate a report of "combat evaded" when nobody has even tried to make combat happen. I did not know that evasive settings will always trigger that message whenever there are troops present from another realm, even federated or allied. Funny feature.

It's like one of them ladies playing hard to get and complaining for all then unwanted attention when in fact nobody is even bothering to look at her.

Regardless, it plays out nicely as inexperience of a young character standing outside of the walls of the capital and seeing an army larger than he has ever seen approaching. Then he tries to play the hero of the day and ends up looking very foolish indeed. 

[Ehndras]

lol which character is that one? commoner?

LOL, yes, he was a commoner. Got arrested for that letter, actually. The travel system still has its kinks, as I don't understand how I could be arrested halfway through an ocean voyage from the east to western continents. It appears that until you reach your destination, certain commands treat you as if you're in the origin while other commands behave as if you've already arrived.

[egamma]

LOL, yes, he was a commoner. Got arrested for that letter, actually. The travel system still has its kinks, as I don't understand how I could be arrested halfway through an ocean voyage from the east to western continents. It appears that until you reach your destination, certain commands treat you as if you're in the origin while other commands behave as if you've already arrived.

While you are traveling, you will see on your status bar (bottom center of the screen) which region you are in. You're either in the starting region, or the destination, and the game will treat it as such. On the first part of your journey you can visit guildhouses (one of the few things you can do while traveling) in the origin, and on the second half of your journey you can do the same with guildhouses in the destination region.

[Anaris]

Well, the problem here is that arresting adventurers has never been updated to account for the fact that it is now possible for adventurers to travel non-instantaneously.

I will try and remember to do this when I Doctrinify arresting adventurers.

[egamma]

Letter from Livia De La Coeur   (2 hours, 13 minutes ago)
Message sent to all members of the Royal Army of Darka (32 recipients)
My Lord,

I hope sincerely we are not to be hired out as common sell-swords.  I find the suggestion that we could be treated as a mercenary force by another kingdom both humiliating and demeaning.  I would rather they felt the bite of my steel than bought my targets with cowards gold.

With best regards,
Livia De La Coeur (Dame of Azzal)

[Zakilevo]

Letter from Livia De La Coeur   (2 hours, 13 minutes ago)
Message sent to all members of the Royal Army of Darka (32 recipients)
My Lord,

I hope sincerely we are not to be hired out as common sell-swords.  I find the suggestion that we could be treated as a mercenary force by another kingdom both humiliating and demeaning.  I would rather they felt the bite of my steel than bought my targets with cowards gold.

With best regards,
Livia De La Coeur (Dame of Azzal)

Doubt her request will be even considered.

[egamma]

Doubt her request will be even considered.

It's just funny that she didn't know that Darka is a mercenary realm.

[Dante Silverfire]

It's just funny that she didn't know that Darka is a mercenary realm.

YES!!!

I love when my character prompts moments like this.

How did she not know that? I'd thought that was like all of their bulletins or something? How they love to fight and only to fight. If Darka is smart they decide to switch back to being mercenaries before this war ends to protect themselves. Its not like they're gonna win as part of the NA.

[Foundation]

Wow, a noble on the Darkan Royal Army does not know she is in a mercenary realm.  What has Darka come to...

[Indirik]

Meh, we haven't had fought under a real contract in years. I can't remember the last one.

[GoldPanda]

Letter from Livia De La Coeur   (2 hours, 13 minutes ago)
Message sent to all members of the Royal Army of Darka (32 recipients)
My Lord,

I hope sincerely we are not to be hired out as common sell-swords.  I find the suggestion that we could be treated as a mercenary force by another kingdom both humiliating and demeaning.  I would rather they felt the bite of my steel than bought my targets with cowards gold.

With best regards,
Livia De La Coeur (Dame of Azzal)

You made me spill water all over my keyboard.   

[egamma]

Letter from Alura Aurea   (8 hours, 45 minutes ago)
Message sent to all full members of "Véinsørmoot" (31 recipients)
Alura,

[REDACTED]

This conversation can be continued at a later date.

[REDACTED]

With honor,
Lady Alura Aurea of Terran
Stratelavian of Véinsørmoot, Senator of Vassar, Marshal of the Pride of Phantaria


Out-of-Character from Alura Aurea   (8 hours, 44 minutes ago)
Message sent to all full members of "Véinsørmoot" (31 recipients)
...Did I just address a letter to myself? Jesus christ. Alright, I'm off for the night. :-P Be back in a few hours folks. Cheers!
Gregory John Struck

[Velax]

Hah, I can imagine the confused look on the scribe's face.

[Foundation]

I'm supposed to send this letter to... whom, my liege?

[Ehndras]

Oh god. I can't believe I did that!

I have NO idea who I was addressing that letter to in particular and I'll be damned if I know why I addressed it to myself.

Genius. That's when you know you need to quietly turn off the laptop and go to sleep. :-P