I agree with you. There has to be some reasonble middleground, but from what I can tell, it takes too long right now.
It is probably holding back more than war. Which duke would seceede with his city while production is at 50% or less?
Which realm would feel it worthwhile to take over a region that will give them almost zero production due to the missing population that will take ages to return?
And so on.
It is realistic, but it makes battlemaster less fun than it could be.
If we make it considerably quicker, then there will be no more way to truly cripple realms, and since it will be too easy for them to get back on their feet and seek revenge, aggressors will be more inclined to completely eliminate their foes, which is not something I would particularly favor. I'm not saying they shouldn't, just that we shouldn't give them any more incentives to do so.
As for secessions, well, the wait makes it all the more legitimate. If you can say you built a city from the grounds up, you have much greater rights to govern it autonomously.
And for expansions? People do it all the time on Dwilight. And elsewhere. It's an investment. If you leave a city rogue, others will take it as soon as they get a chance.
